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7 Ways To Know If Your Online Date Is A Time Waster

7 Ways To Know If Your Online Date Is A Time Waster


We are in the digital age, and everything can be delivered to our doorsteps. Food, clothes, gadgets, and (best believe) love. This pattern of delivery is accessible in our time, and not necessarily a negative happenstance. Over the past few years, a good number of couples have their love story hinged on “started from the DM, now we are here“, and have gone on to write an enviable love tale. However, there’s always a flip side to every story. While many have found legit love online, there’s a good number of time wasters with a sea of ulterior motives that might not be in your favor.

If someone is on the same page as you and there is a connection, but things aren’t adding up, the human instinct is often top-notch in detecting it too. Simply put, if you are surfing the net to know whether your online date is interested in you, that’s the first sign that perhaps something’s not right in the relationship. Also, note that you might be wrong, but at least this information is worth finding out for inner peace and security to prevail in your relationship.

Check out 7 signs to know if your online date is interested in you…

#1. It seems forced

Photo: Ron Lach/Pexels

If you’re in a situation-ship with someone who gives the vibes that they’re with you but don’t really want to be with you, that’s a red flag. While we often underestimate it in the name of love, your gut feeling is one of the most important signs that you’re sailing on a doomed boat. For instance, a person who insinuates that (s)he is with you because of some other reason other than a sincere interest in you should be avoided. Perhaps, they simply have ulterior motives. 

#2.  You always have to reach out

Photo by Connor Gardenhire/Pexels

Monday to Sunday you’re the one reaching out to check up on your “love,” that’s not good. Sadly, if this continues, you only appear desperate and may have to settle for something you don’t deserve. Is your online date interested in you? Then they’ll make the effort to be in your life. So take a break and if your date doesn’t make an effort, then let things go. 

#3. They are acting shady

Photo: Nick Demou/Pexels

Does it seem like your online date has a life they are not willing to show you? Bella never answers Jake’s calls on the first ring. She either picks up after multiple tries or calls back at her own convenient time. Sometimes, her voice echoes as though she snuck into the bathroom to talk to him. If your crush made a habit out of this sneaky behavior, maybe it’s time to bring this up before reaching conclusions. There might be a good reason, or maybe not.

#4. They are on about themselves

Photo: August de Richelieu/Pexels

Your online date isn’t interested in you if (s)he’s too self-engrossed and doesn’t ask you questions about yourself. They may even mix up your name occasionally. Imagine being called a different name when your name sits pretty on your profile—minimal effort. Also, if you’re struggling half the time to keep the conversation going, that is a major sign. Give it a few days of not initiating a conversation, and watch if (s)he bothers to reach out.

#5. They are too busy, all the time

Photo: Ketut Subiyanto/Pexels

The fact is, we are all adults with functional lives within and outside the internet. Yes, some individuals have tighter schedules, but even the busiest people prioritize in order to be more productive. “Oh, I’ll see if we can talk later this week. My schedule is kinda packed. Hi, thanks for calling again. I am sorry I didn’t return your calls, I’m very busy right now. Can we talk later?” If this is a typical occurrence where you feel drained from trying to keep up, breathe. Rethink. Pause. Rest.

#6. The signals are confusing

Photo: Alex Green/Pexels

This bunch is the absolute worst. They know the right words to say, flirt with you, and lead you on. This sounds great, but there’s no progress. They are not initiating meetups, some days they go AWOL and it’s been a year of rigmaroles. If it’s just good vibes and midnight chatting, maybe it’s time to ask them what they want. Better still, let them know what you want out of a relationship. If your needs do not tally, it is time to move on.

#7. Your online date is not interested if they always jeopardize meeting plans

Photo: Tnarg/Pexels

This is definitely a very obvious sign, but when we’re in too deep, denial seems to be a fortress of comfort. Trust is an integral part of any relationship, but if your online date constantly lines up excuses to avoid a physical meeting, perhaps, it’s time to look through the lens of reason. On countless occasions, Hannah had sent flight fare to Patrick, but he never ran out of creative reasons why he couldn’t show up. He eventually blocked her from social media and moved on. This is one out of a million con artists who date for all selfish reasons. Another reason to tread with caution in this internet dating space.

There’s no emotion higher than love, and we all yearn for the thrill of loving and being loved in return. This shouldn’t blind us to emotional and/or financial fraudsters who exploit vulnerability and openness for selfish gains. Also, if you realize your online date “isn’t dating” you, resist the urge to become cold and unwilling to open your heart to cupid again. You never lose anything when you love, whether it’s the right or wrong person—only lessons learned.

Featured image: KoolShooters/Pexels

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